Fantastic, Troy! I love how you painted this whole scene. I was right there in the room, looking at the two photos of the room. What a way to create a bit of a Russian dolls sensation or mirrors facing each other.
I love entering into these two scenes through the photographs, like a worm hole connecting past and future. I do this often when I look at something, a tree, a loved one, reaching forwards and backwards to feel the world touched and untouched by their presence. And your nod to the strange transmutation of “string things” —once a colorful thread, now an electrical cord—such a rude reminder of how our world now has been stripped of the soft, the warm, the intimate.
More short stories please! Your style makes me smile.
This carries so much quiet weight — grief, memory, and time layered like dust on familiar things. The photos-as-portals motif is haunting, but it’s the tenderness between Bert and Libby that stayed with me. Love, memory, and a ghost in the knitting basket — gently devastating in all the right ways. Just stunning.
The way you have this story move forward and back in time through the characters thoughts, while it all takes place in one moment, is brilliant. The use of photos to do this was equally impressive.
That does sound wonderful! But sadly it’s not something I’ve ever experienced. I’m more of a neurotic nit-picking nut-job when it comes to me writing, so much so that even if it does come out well rather quickly, I still end up fiddling with it. But hey, we are who we are haha :)
I love that this rewards careful reading. I came back for a second time, and I’m glad I did. When the sequencing clicked (or at least I think it clicked!), every scene I saw changed, not unlike between his photos.
You do an excellent job building the tension in this story Troy. The whole story happens in an instant yet we are taken forward and backward along a fine line, wondering all along what's up with the wrong picture. This is a great use of both place and time to hold the reader's attention.
I really enjoyed this, Troy. The slight sense of uncanny in John Cheever golf club territory was delightful.
I know him only by name and reputation, so now I'm intrigued to investigate. Thanks Jeffrey!
Fantastic, Troy! I love how you painted this whole scene. I was right there in the room, looking at the two photos of the room. What a way to create a bit of a Russian dolls sensation or mirrors facing each other.
Thanks Holly - pretty sure I saw the pictures in my mind first, and the story grew around them.
I love entering into these two scenes through the photographs, like a worm hole connecting past and future. I do this often when I look at something, a tree, a loved one, reaching forwards and backwards to feel the world touched and untouched by their presence. And your nod to the strange transmutation of “string things” —once a colorful thread, now an electrical cord—such a rude reminder of how our world now has been stripped of the soft, the warm, the intimate.
More short stories please! Your style makes me smile.
Thank you for your insights, Kim - I'd love to write more shorts, I really should make a point. 🩷
This carries so much quiet weight — grief, memory, and time layered like dust on familiar things. The photos-as-portals motif is haunting, but it’s the tenderness between Bert and Libby that stayed with me. Love, memory, and a ghost in the knitting basket — gently devastating in all the right ways. Just stunning.
Thanks Gino, I did feel a little wicked sounding that alarm at the end after such a sweet scene. ;)
The way you have this story move forward and back in time through the characters thoughts, while it all takes place in one moment, is brilliant. The use of photos to do this was equally impressive.
Bravo sir :)
Thanks Michael - this story just tumbled out in one sitting, as I recall - it's nice when we don't have to work so hard to hit the right notes. :)
That does sound wonderful! But sadly it’s not something I’ve ever experienced. I’m more of a neurotic nit-picking nut-job when it comes to me writing, so much so that even if it does come out well rather quickly, I still end up fiddling with it. But hey, we are who we are haha :)
I love that this rewards careful reading. I came back for a second time, and I’m glad I did. When the sequencing clicked (or at least I think it clicked!), every scene I saw changed, not unlike between his photos.
Great stuff!
Thanks Michael - a second reading - I'm pleased it was worth the extra effort. :)
You do an excellent job building the tension in this story Troy. The whole story happens in an instant yet we are taken forward and backward along a fine line, wondering all along what's up with the wrong picture. This is a great use of both place and time to hold the reader's attention.
Thank you Donna! I'm not much for time-travel stories, but this was tt-adjacent and a lot of fun to write. :)
Great story, Troy. Thanks for sharing.
Thank YOU Martine :)
Reading it now, even as we speak.
Hope you like it Michael!