Lamb ♣ Table of Contents + Origin Story
ALL EPISODES available in AUDIO
Lamb
Two friends on different but parallel paths, from private school through college and their raging twenties, until the abrupt, mysterious end of their friendship.
Told through reminiscences, journal excerpts, letters, poetry and short stories, Lamb is a snapshot in episodes of young men coming of age after the decimation of AIDS—a sometimes shiny, sometimes dark afterparty of gay awakening.
First three episodes FREE.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Episode 01 ♣ We Regret to Inform You - AUDIO - FREE
Episode 02 ♣ Poof - AUDIO - FREE
Episode 03 ♣ Eau de Lamb - AUDIO - FREE
Episode 04 ♣ Hope Gardens - AUDIO
Episode 05 ♣ We (1984) - AUDIO
Episode 06 ♣ Death and the Bird - AUDIO
Episode 07 ♣ The Stranger - AUDIO
Episode 08 ♣ No Man's Land - AUDIO
Episode 09 ♣ Burning Man (1994) - AUDIO
Episode 10 ♣ Count Crunchula - AUDIO
Episode 11 ♣ The Watch on the Wall - AUDIO
Episode 12 ♣ Lamb of the Flies - AUDIO
Episode 13 ♣ Mr. Perez’s Apartment - AUDIO
Episode 14 ♣ Crushing - AUDIO
Episode 15 ♣ Buck - AUDIO
Episode 16 ♣ He Said, He Said - AUDIO
Episode 17 ♣ Pump House - AUDIO
Episode 18 ♣ Sunday Morning - AUDIO
Episode 19 ♣ Room for Dessert - AUDIO
Episode 20 ♣ The Box - AUDIO
Episode 21 ♣ Baby - AUDIO
Episode 22 ♣ The Echo of Embrace - AUDIO
Episode 23 ♣ Daddies - AUDIO
Episode 24 ♣ To Lamb - AUDIO
♣ Kind words for Lamb ♣
“.. fab.. just fab.. & totally WILD!”
“As I'm sure you know, this is brilliant, Troy.
I am excited and terrified by how much I've fallen for dear Lamb.”
“Oh-my-word-Troy-this-is-SO-GOOD!!!”
The Origins of Lamb
Looking to keep the ball rolling after the completion of my first novel, Watrspout, in 2022, I set out to tell a new story based on a friendship from high school which took a dark turn.
Around 2003, I received a note from our school that my best friend had died—it was a form letter, not personalized to me but sent out to all his classmates, and provided no details. He was 33 years old.
We had not kept in touch for a variety of reasons, not the least of which was that we both were gay and in the closet—for me anyway, high school had been a painful, fearful time I was eager to put behind me. But the friendship had been close while it lasted, and for nearly 20 years, I wondered about him—how he had lived, how he died—and what might have happened between us if our parents, school, classmates, the world generally, had been more tolerant and accepting of our sexuality.
Through some online sleuthing I finally discovered his cause of death, but little else. I felt moved to examine the feelings and circumstances of our friendship, and began to draft a novel loosely organized around a couple of pivotal moments. Here was a mood board I drafted for that effort, working title According to Marc.
The whole thing quickly went sideways, growing unwieldy and overly complex as I tried to steer it into a thriller when ultimately it wanted be another one of my more character-driven stories. I abandoned the project after a prolonged effort to re-energize it—change of genre, change of perspective, change of characters. It dissolved into a lifeless mush after about 50 pages.
From that stalled project, however, Lamb the character sprang to life in my imagination. I had been wanting to start a serial fiction project, and the prospect of writing a series of self-contained but connected stories centered around this endearing misfit and his friend/narrator (neither of which, by the way, resembles either me or my friend in the least) soon generated a burst of initial episodes, some of them salvaged from that previous project.
I hope this tale might eventually find a wider audience beyond Substack and FORD KNOWS—with your help spreading the word to friends, family and acquaintances who might enjoy a queer story, that might be possible.
“That was amazing! Wow. That voice.”
“That's some seriously slick writing there, Mr. Troy Ford. Love it.”
“Brother, this is so good. I add a +1 to all of the well-deserved praise the first installment has received thus far in the comments, and eagerly await the next installment.”
“Great work and great read.”
“Brilliant writing, Troy! Looking forward to more!”
“I'm in, 100%. In this short chapter you've established Lamb so completely, I feel like he's someone I knew in childhood. Can't wait for next week.”
“Wow, dear Troy, what an incredible, riveting, captivating beginning. Lamb - what a character.”
Thank you so very much for your support!
THREAD: “What we talk about when we talk about ‘Song of Myself’”
SoM, v. 5 | “Swiftly arose and spread around me the peace and knowledge that pass all the argument of the earth, And I know that the hand of God is the promise of my own, And I know that the spirit of God is the brother of my own...” | AUDIO
I really appreciate this bit of backstory, Troy. It's interesting to know how the story, and perhaps Lamb, have been brewing for a while. I know I said I wasn't going to keep on about (I lied, apparently!) but isn't it wild how many people have the sense that Lamb is someone they knew / know..?? Is this something that is interesting to you, too, or am I fixating on it unnecessarily..?! Help! 💜
From pain - and dissonance, we write, and we learn about ourselves along the way. I'm so sorry that high school was shit and that your friend died. It's incredible the way some things stick with us and just won't come unstuck in our brains no matter how much we think we've tried to create with them already. Poor Lamb but lucky us for this story. Hope it will reach some people who might need to hear it for whatever reason.